So I've been on the fence about getting an iBOT.
I mean, do I want to be able to go on the beach with
my daughter and my dogs, or watch from a distance? Do
I want to have an eye level conversation with a standing
adult or would I rather strain my neck? If I go to a show,
would I like to see the stage, or stare at the butt of the
person standing infront of me? Do I want to be able to get
up and down stairs independently or would it be better to
not go where I want to go, or to break someone else's back
to get me up the stairs? As you might image, it's a dilemma
that I've been wrestling with for like about 8 years now.
It's probably the hardest goddamn decision I've ever
had to make in my entire life.

I'm happy to report that my decision is finally made.
My answer is yes! Yes, I am going to get an iBOT! Wanna
know what sealed the deal? I'll tell you! I know this guy
who has had his iBOT for one year now, and Johnson and Johnson
Federal Expressed him a one year anniversary gift. Hold onto
your britches, cuz this will knock them off... the gifts they
sent him via Federal Express included hand lotion, baby powder,
and bandaides. Woo-hoo! Now if that ain't a deal sealer,
I don't know what is.

I went to my parent's house last weekend to celebrate Easter.
This is their cat.

Here are some eggs we decorated.

We played a game called Catch Phrase.

It's a super fun game, but if your mom says, "It is what
I am sitting on", the answer probably isn't, "fat ass". It's
probably "chair". And if your sister sings, "Somewhere...", the
answer probably isn't "Kermit the Frog". It's "Over the
Rainbow".

I've put together a compilation of some of my best
wheelchair tricks. You can see them here.

That backflip was the shit.

~~~~~~~~~~~

-That's not me in the video.
-My mom doesn't have a fat ass.
-J&J really did send that one year anniversary gift. And
they really did sent it Fed Express.
-I haven't been on the fence about getting an iBOT. I've
wanted one with all my heart ever since I first saw it on
TV many years ago.

Fleas. I give my dogs and cats that flea medicine
that you squirt onto their skin and it kills fleas,
ticks, flea eggs, larvae, as well as repel mosquitoes.
I don't know what it is. Some nasty chemicals. It's
really the only way to get rid of the fleas though.

So anyway. I thought I'd be smart and save a few
bucks for my iBOT by getting the cheap stuff at the
grocery store instead of the vet. Bad idea. This is
what it did to my oldest cat Mike:

I put the medicine on him two days ago. Yesterday his
hair was falling out and his skin was pink and swollen.
Today it is scabbed over. Poor kitty. DO NOT buy Sergeant's.
They suck. It was really stinky stuff and it hurt my kitty.

The box says: If signs of sensitivity occurs, bathe your pet
with mild soap and rinse with large amounts of water. Oh yeah,
that's funny - rinse your cat with large amounts of water. Right.

Let's see...
cat scab
dead fly
Chuck E Cheese's
chocolate dog barf
skeletons
killing mice with sticky paper
fat ass
What next?

I have to say that today was a beautiful day. 70 something
and sunny. I took photos at a couple of friend's houses.
First off, here is my friend's dog Nick:

And my other friend's dog Bella:

And here are some photos from their wonderful gardens:

Well, I was hoping for a better picture, but my camera failed
me. I wanted some great detail, such as the expression on the
fly's face, but no luck. I was pleased with the hairs on his
back though.

On a serious note, one of the reasons I like macro photography
so much is because I often see things that I never would have
noticed with my naked eye.

You know what goes well with flys? Sandwiches. Here is how
to make one:

Bed

It's 8:30 on a Monday night and I'd like to go to
bed. Getting all comfy under the warm covers
reading a book I just checked out.. oh yeah,
that's where I want to be. Ahhh, The Catcher
in the Rye. I was browsing at the library and
saw it. I haven't read it since I was a kid.
I hated reading until I read The Catcher in the
Rye. It was the first book I read and loved. It
was the book that introduced me to the joy of
getting lost in a good book. It was the book
that changed reading from homework to pleasure.

So anyway, I can't go to bed yet because I am
waiting for my daughter to come home. I can only
hope she will be home soon, for her sake and mine.
Seriously, I hope she's not completely overwhelmed.

Why would she be overwhelmed you ask? Because
she's at Chuck E Cheese's. The poor girl. Her
dad's nephew's son is having a birthday party
there.

People *willingly* go to Chuck E Cheese's. It's true.
And some people, like my ex's nephew apparently,
*choose* to have parties there. Shocking. I'd rather
go to the dentist. I really would.

If you've never been there, consider yourself lucky.
And if you ever get invited, trust me, don't go.
Pretend you are sick. Pretend you got a flat tire.
Pretend you had to go to a funeral. It doesn't matter.
Just don't go.

I went to one once, and it was bad. I still have
nightmares and it happened over 5 years ago.

Alright, I need to go look for a dead fly now. Halfway
through writing this my dog started barking which means
she needed to go out. After letting her out, I noticed
a dead fly on my bed. I suppose most normal people would
take the fly to the garbage. Not me. I wiped it off the
bed onto the floor. As I was leaving the room, I thought,
darn, I should've kept the thing and taken macro photos
of it tomorrow. Yes, it's things like this that excite me.
Hopefully none of the cats have eaten it already. Wish me
luck. If I find it, I'll post a picture tomorrow because I
know anyone reading this will want to see photo of a dead fly
as much as they wanted to see chocolate dog barf or fat ass.

Wanna know what sucks about the iBOT?

I don't have one. That's what sucks.

Seriously, it is messing with my head that I
don't have one. While I was fine living without
one for nearly 3 decades, I was fine with it
because it didn't exist! Now that it exists,
and I've tried it, and I loved it, but I don't
have one, I feel like I'm losing my mind.

Every single day since December I've been
thinking about the things I could do if I had
an iBOT. For example, I'd like to be out
exploring the neighborhood right now. Sure,
I can explore a bit in my manual, but not as
much as I could if I had an iBOT.

It's very frustrating.

I will get one though. I'm not sure when or
how, but it will happen.

Davenport, couch, or sofa

Which one do you call it?

Rodents

This is Elvis and Caramel.

They are gerbils and they live in my daughter's
classroom. We are gerbil sitting this week (spring
break).

This is Hammie.

Hammie is a hamster. We are hamster sitting this
week while Hammie's family is in California.

Today my daughter and I went to Home Depot to look
at plants. I was admiring a gorgeous Calla Lily and
thinking that life is so beautiful, la la la. Then I
turned my head and this was staring me in the face.

What an awful way to die.

If you've been reading my last few entries, I bet
your thrilled with me. First the dog barf, then the
skeletons, now this. I'm just a great big ball of
joy these days, aren't I?

Sedlec Ossuary

I remember as a teen looking through a
National Geographic and seeing a photo
of a place in Europe that was decorated
with the bones of thousands of people. I
remember thinking to myself, "Wow, I'd love
to visit that place someday." And then I
thought, "There's no way that place is going
to be wheelchair accessible." Discouraged
by the one paragraph in National Geographic
about the place, the lack of the internet
for quick and easy access to more information,
and the knowledge that places like that are
pretty much never wheelchair accessible, I
tucked it away somewhere and didn't think
about it again.

Until yesterday.

A myspace friend wrote a blog about a book
she recently read. The book was written by
John Connolly. Her interest in his book lead
her to his website, which then lead her a
quicktime video made by Connolly about Sedlec.
I watched the video and was once again
fascinated by this place. Unlike last time,
I now had quick and easy access to more info
about it. Also unlike last time, I now may
be able to physically navigate the place - if
and when I get an iBOT. There is one large
obstacle that may be a problem and that is,
getting the iBOT from Prague to Sedlec. I
doubt transportation for power wheelchairs
is common there. There's gotta be a way though.
I'd probably have to rent a special van or bus,
which I'm sure would cost a small fortune, but
worth it. But who knows if I will ever make it
there. There isn't enough time or money to see
all the places I want to see... I have always
wanted to visit Prague though. When I went to
Europe in my 20s, I considered stopping in Prague.
I decided against it because it seemed so much
more wheelchair unfriendly than the places I did
visit, including London, Paris, and Amsterdam.

I did some internet searching about Sedlec today
and I found its history interesting. In 1278, a
monk from Sedlec travelled to Palestine. He
brought back a handful of earth from Palestine
to Sedlec and referred to it as 'Holy Soil'. He
spread the soil over the cemetery and it quickly
became one of the most popular burial grounds in
central Europe. People from all over the country
and Europe wanted to be buried there. In one year
alone, during the 14th century, it is said that
nearly 600 bodies per week were brought to Sedlec,
largely due to victims of the plague.

Huge ditches 30 feet deep and 20 feet across were
dug to accomodate all the bodies. The dead were
sewn up in their shrouds and placed in these large
common graves, sometimes as many as 1,500 in a
single pit. They were then covered by a thin
layer of dirt. The bodies very quickly decomposed
in these conditions. As more bodies came in and
one pit filled, another older pit was uncovered
and emptied of it's bones. These bones were then
stored wherever space could be found.

Around 1400, a church was built in the center
of the cemetery. The lower chapel was built
to be used as an ossuary to hold the skeletons
of more than 40,000 people, most of whom were
killed by the plague.

In 1870, a woodcarver named František Rint was
hired to put the heaps of bones into order. He
artisically arranged approximately 40,000 human
skeletons to form decorations and furnishings
for the chapel, which still remain today.

If you are interested in seeing an excellent 6
minute video about Sedlec, go here:

http://www.johnconnollybooks.com/sedlec_movie.html

You can also see a short film about it here:

http://www.awn.com/heaven_and_hell/svank/svank9.htm

The 2nd one is, IMO, not as good as the first one I
listed. It was done in 1970 by surrealist Czech
filmmaker Jan Svankmajer. It is grainy, b&w, not
in English and a little over 10 minutes long. If
you like trippy stuff, you might prefer this video
over the other one.

And now for something completely different, my
tulips are blooming! Yay for tulips. Yay for
spring. Yay for yellow. Yay for photography.
Yay for life.

Name: Trudy

Species: Canine

Breed: Scruffy Mutt

Age: 10-something

Place of Birth: Unknown

Likes: Food

Dislikes: Any dog bigger than her

Crime: Stealing and consuming chocolate

Been part of my family for: almost 2 years

Trudy says: I really want my mommy to get
an iBOT because then we can explore more
places, and she can frolic on the sandy
beach with me!

A couple of weeks ago I bought a bag of
Easter chocolates. The next day, I thought
to myself, "Gee, I think I might enjoy a
chocolate". So I looked to the table where
I had last seen them, but they were gone. I
searched and I searched but they were nowhere
to be found. The next day I thought to
myself, "Gee, I think I might enjoy a
chocolate". So I looked to the table where
I had last seen them, but they were gone. I
searched and I searched but they were nowhere
to be found. The next day I thought to
myself, "Gee, I think I might enjoy a
chocolate". So I looked to the table where
I had last seen them, but they were gone. I
searched and I searched but they were nowhere
to be found. The next day I was sweeping
the junk that had collected under a piece
of furniture in the living room, and I
discovered an empty bag that had at one
time in recent history containted Easter
chocolates. It had Trudy spit all over
it.

As you may or may not know, chocolate can
be toxic to dogs (and cats). She must have
thrown it up outside without my knowing.

A few days ago I bought another bag of
chocolates. I brilliantly deposited them
on the table where I had placed the last
package. Then I left to run an errand.

When I came home, I wasn't looking where I was
going when I felt something cold and wet
on my hand. My first thought was cat barf,
because that happens all the time, but when
I looked at my wheel, sweater sleeve, and
hand, I discovered it wasn't partly digested
cat food, but some kind of brown, liquidy
stuff.

"Oh yay, it's even better than cat barf,
it's diarrhea!" I thought. I became confused
however when my nose was not offended.

What was this liquidy brown stuff on the floor
that did not make me gag? I retraced my rolls
and found a large pile of the brown liquid stuff.
Knowing it wasn't diarrhea but still not knowing
what it was, my finger dipped. My tongue licked.

Chocolate!

Oh come on, you don't really believe I did that,
do you? I would never do such a thing. I did
taste cat pee once, but I swear, it wasn't on
purpose.

The mystery of the unknown liquidy brown stuff
was solved when I noticed the foil wrappers.

I took a photo of it, because how often does a
person have the opportunity to get a photo of
chocolatey dog barf?

And now I would like to share that photo
with you. (Sorry I didn't take the time to
focus better.)



You're very welcome.

Above is a little sumthin' to look at.
Below is a little sumthin' to ponder.

Do crazy cat ladies become crazy because
of all the cats, OR are they already crazy
and that is why they get all the cats? Kind
of like, which came first - the chicken
or the egg, but instead, which came first -
the craziness or the cats?

I live with four cats and I'm kinda thinking
that the cats come first.

I'm starting to think the animal kingdom is
out to get me. I've had this gigantic spider
living above my front door all winter long.
The other day I came home and as I'm reaching
to put my key in the door, it suddenly starts
to drop down. So I sit there and I wait. It
drops all the way to the ground and I'm not
kidding, it started toward me. Now I'm not
an animal killer. I don't even eat or wear
animals. But this spider was scary. And it
was charging me! I had to do something, so
I grabbed the recyling bin sitting there and
I quickly moved it between the spider and I.
The spider got scared and went back up it's
web. I said to my daughter, "Okay, when your
daddy comes over tomorrow night, lets ask him
if he will catch it in a jar and move it some-
where. Somewhere like the park a few blocks
away". The next day, it was GONE! It lived
there all winter long and now it's suddenly
gone. I think it went in a hiding hole and
it's going to pounce on me the next time I
am out there. Luckily I have a back door.
Otherwise I'd be trapped in my house for-
maybe-ever.

My own dog Trudy is out to get me as well.
I'll save that story for tomorrow.