Sunday, January 28, 2007

Blockers


If you are a wheelchair user, you know all too
well about Blockers. Wait a minute, come to think
of it, you probably don't know about them because
99% of wheelchair users sit in their house all day,
every day staring at the four walls wondering
what to do next. I guess it would be more realistic
to say that if you are one of the 1% of wheelchair
users who leave the house, you know all to well about
Blockers. And of course if you are not a
wheelchair users, you know nothing of Blockers.

So what exactly is a Blocker you ask. A Blocker
is a person who lays down on the sidewalk whenever
they see a wheelchair coming. They won't move until
the wheelchair user says, "Please allow me to pass
dear Blocker", while handing them a $5 bill. (I make
sure I carry at least 10 $5 bills with me wherever
I go because if don't have a 5, I'm SOL.)

I realized this morning that after I get my iBOT,
Blockers will be in for a huge surprise. When I
see one laying in my path, I'll put the iBOT into
4 Wheel Function, turn up the speed, and plow
right over the top of them. The look on their faces
will be priceless. And boy am I going to have a lot
more money to spend on other things. Things that I
will actually enjoy, like chocolate pudding.

That's right, it won't be much longer until I start
calling Blockers "Speedbumps"! Kudos to you Dean
Kamen, inventor of the iBOT.

ADDED LATER: I was only kidding when I wrote this.
Someone thought I was serious. People do not block
me and demand $5. I won't run anyone over. 99% of
wheelchair users do not sit in their houses staring
at the four walls wondering what to do next. Oh, and
in a post from a few days ago, there aren't really
alligators, and tigers, and elephants, etc in Oregon.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hee hee ha ha.

G

Anonymous said...

really? people really block you? that's horrible!

Wheelchair Revolution! said...

No, they don't. Sorry, I didn't think anyone would believe me. I have a strange sense of humor.

I'll go back and edit it to add that I was only joking.

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h. said...

Alrighty, here is a question for you.. it is not exactly on the line of Blockers, but sort of on a parallel track.

When someone (who is not in a wheelchair) is talking to you, is it considerate or condescending for them to squat next to you to be at eye level? I can see it either way, and can also imagine the issue to be a personal preference sort of thing. What is your opinion?

Your blog has really set me to thinking, which I guess is the point.

h.

Wheelchair Revolution! said...

That's a great question h. Instead of answering it here, I will address it in today's entry.